by Martin Mundt
Recommended for the
2003 Bram Stoker Award.
1. INTERIOR. SHOPPING MALL. EARLY EVENING. NEIL is window-shopping in a crowded mall. He is well-built, thirty-five years old and nice-looking. His left wrist and forearm are in a cast, which is covered in more than a dozen signatures. He has a pair of headphones hanging around his neck, and a Walkman clipped to his belt. A WOMAN passes him on her way into a lingerie shop, and NEIL shifts his position so that she bumps into his left arm. WOMAN Excuse me. NEIL Sorry. My fault. The WOMAN enters the store. NEIL loiters outside. He slips on his headphones and starts listening to a tape. As he moves, his jacket opens, and a huge hunting knife is briefly visible on his belt. Sounds leak from the headphones. The sounds are not music, but the screams of a woman. NEIL smiles, and the mall sounds fade. WOMAN ON TAPE Please let me go. Please don't... A whip hits flesh. The WOMAN ON TAPE screams, cries. NEIL (on tape) You can scream. I like screaming. Just remember: scream into the microphone. NEIL's voice is on the tape, but he mouths both parts silently as he sits on a bench outside the lingerie store. WOMAN ON TAPE Please. I don't want to die. I'm afraid. I... A whip hits flesh. Screams. NEIL (on tape) You're beautiful when You're afraid. A whip hits flesh. Screams. Crying. CUT TO: 2. INTERIOR. ANOTHER PART OF THE MALL. ELLIE walks into a high-end shoe store. She is thirty and pretty, dressed expensively. CUT TO: 3. INTERIOR. MALL. NEIL sits on the bench, listening to his tape. An OLD MAN sits down on the other end of the bench and opens a newspaper. CUT TO: 4. EXTERIOR. PARKING LOT. SIX WEEKS PREVIOUS. JAN, twenty-five, pretty, is looking for her car. NEIL comes up from behind her and wraps his right arm around her waist, his left arm, in the cast, bringing the hunting knife up to her throat. NEIL I'm not going to kill you today, if you do exactly what I say. CUT TO: 5. INTERIOR. MALL. NEIL is sitting on his bench, mouthing the words he said to JAN. Screaming is still leaking out of the headphones. The WOMAN leaves the lingerie store. The OLD MAN glances up at the odd sounds leaking from NEIL's headphones. NEIL stands up and follows the WOMAN, slipping off his headphones and turning off the Walkman. The OLD MAN glimpses the knife. CUT TO: 6. INTERIOR. MALL. ELLIE leaves the shoe store, carrying a shopping bag. CUT TO: 7. INTERIOR. MALL. NEIL is following the WOMAN. CUT TO: 8. EXTERIOR. PARKING LOT. SIX WEEKS PREVIOUS. NEIL drags JAN to his car. He opens the trunk and forces JAN inside. CUT TO: 9. INTERIOR. SHOPPING MALL. NEIL follows WOMAN as she is leaving the mall. She walks through doors into the parking lot. NEIL reaches under his jacket for his knife, pushing through the doors after her. CUT TO: 10. INTERIOR. SHOPPING MALL. The OLD MAN is talking to a uniformed SECURITY GUARD, who is a college kid. The OLD MAN mimes the size of NEIL's knife, pointing which way NEIL went. CUT TO: 11. EXTERIOR. PARKING LOT. NEIL exits the mall doors into the parking lot and sunshine, just as a car pulls up to the WOMAN and stops. The WOMAN opens the passenger door and gets in. WOMAN Hi, honey. NEIL makes a quick turn away from the car. CUT TO: 12. INTERIOR. SHOPPING MALL. The SECURITY GUARD approaches the doors by which the WOMAN and NEIL left. CUT TO: 13. INTERIOR. SHOPPING MALL. The OLD MAN sits back on the same bench and re-opens his newspaper. ELLIE passes him and enters the lingerie store. CUT TO: 14. INTERIOR. SHOPPING MALL. NEIL re-enters the mall by another entrance. He slips on his headphones and starts his tape. CUT TO: 15. EXTERIOR. PARKING LOT. The SECURITY GUARD stands outside the mall entrance, looking around at nothing. CUT TO: 16. INTERIOR. SHOPPING MALL. ELLIE leaves the lingerie store. She walks past the OLD MAN. The OLD MAN glances up to watch her pass, then returns to his newspaper. NEIL passes the OLD MAN, following ELLIE. The OLD MAN sees NEIL. CUT TO: 17. EXTERIOR. PARKING LOT. SIX WEEKS PREVIOUS. NEIL handcuffs and gags JAN in the trunk of his car. He closes the trunk. CUT TO: 18. INTERIOR. SHOPPING MALL. The OLD MAN is talking with the SECURITY GUARD, pointing in the opposite direction from before. CUT TO: 19. INTERIOR. SHOPPING MALL. ELLIE walks towards an entrance at the far end of the mall, away from most of the shoppers and busy stores. She glances behind herself a few times. CUT TO: 20. INTERIOR. SHOPPING MALL. The SECURITY GUARD is walking through the crowd, looking around. CUT TO: 21. INTERIOR. SHOPPING MALL. The OLD MAN stands by his bench and searches around the area. He sits and opens his newspaper. CUT TO: 22. INTERIOR. SHOPPING MALL. ELLIE approaches an entrance. The stores around her are empty. She pushes her way through the door, and, on the other side, wobbles on her high heels and turns her ankle. She stops and lets the door close behind her. NEIL grabs the pushbar of the closing door with his left hand and draws his hunting knife. The headphones are around his neck. ELLIE whirls around, her ankle unhurt, with a stungun in one hand and a small statue of the Venus de Milo in the other. She pushes a stud on the statue and a stiletto blade springs out of the statue's base, locking into place with a click. NEIL and ELLIE stop, five feet away from each other. A second passes. Two. NEIL The Stiletto Killer? ELLIE The Cassette Rapist? NEIL Yeah. Damn. ELLIE Oh, wow. This is really awkward. NEIL Yeah. Awkward. They wait a beat. ELLIE So, what do we do now? NEIL Um...I don't know. This has never happened to me before. ELLIE Well, don't look at me. I've never met a serial killer before either. NEIL Another serial killer. ELLIE Another serial killer. NEIL Um. I really admire your work. ELLIE Really? NEIL Really. ELLIE Thanks. And I like that cassette thing you do. Sending copies of your murders to the families. That's very powerful. Very controlling. NEIL Uh, thanks. Cable stole that from me, you know. I saw it on HBO after I started doing it. ELLIE Well, it's a great idea. It would be so easy for something like that to come off as all needy or showy, but you really make it work. NEIL Uh, well, thanks. So, nice shoes. ELLIE Thanks. They're Jimmy Choo's. 375 dollars a pair, but sometimes a girl just has to splurge, right? NEIL indicates ELLIE's stungun and stiletto with his knife. NEIL You were going to...you know...with me? ELLIE Well, to you, yes. NEIL But didn't I just read in the papers that they found one of yours just yesterday? ELLIE Guilty as charged. NEIL Great turnaround time. Dump someone on Monday; bag me on Wednesday. Very impressive. ELLIE Impulse buy. You seemed interested. NEIL Oh, I was, but it was really more professional than personal. No insult intended--I just had a little something different in mind than you did. But if we weren't in the same line of work, you'd've bagged me for sure. ELLIE You're not just saying that? NEIL Nope. Bagged me for sure. Um...if you don't mind me asking, are those the heels you use to gouge out your victims? eyes with? He indicates the shoes ELLIE is wearing. ELLIE No. These are just bait shoes. She indicates the shopping bag. ELLIE Those are the real killers. Manolo Blahniks. Five hundred a pair, one pair for every kill. If it's going to be the last thing a guy's ever going to see, it shouldn't be something from Payless. NEIL It should be special. ELLIE Exactly. Something with some class. NEIL Yeah. Well, like I said, nice shoes, but I really should be going. You know...(He waves his knife around.) things to do. ELLIE That's OK, and I'm flattered. It's not every man who wants to gut you and rape your gastrointestinal tract. I mean, most men couldn't find a woman's clitoris if it glowed in the dark, much less cut it off and keep it. That's real passion. Real commitment. It was an honor to meet you. NEIL Well, you know, uh, thanks. ELLIE Well, we probably should go. NEIL Yeah. Well, have a nice day. They back away from each other. The door closes between them. They turn and walk away. CUT TO: 23. INTERIOR. SHOPPING MALL. NEIL rejoins the crowd. He slips on his headphones and turns on the Walkman. CUT TO: 24. EXTERIOR. PARKING LOT. ELLIE stands on the sidewalk outside the doors, waiting for traffic. The SECURITY GUARD exits the mall behind her and looks around. SECURITY GUARD Excuse me, miss? ELLIE turns. ELLIE Yes? SECURITY GUARD Have you seen anyone suspicious? White guy? (He holds his hand slightly above his own height.) Yay-tall. I got a report there's a guy might be following women around. You haven't seen anyone, have you? ELLIE Uh, no, nobody. SECURITY GUARD Uh-huh. Well, OK. Be careful, though, all right? ELLIE Should I be worried? Because now I'm worried. SECURITY GUARD No. Sorry. Probably nothing, you know? ELLIE Nothing. Well, OK. SECURITY GUARD Well, thanks, anyway. The GUARD starts to turn. ELLIE Excuse me. Sorry. Um, do you think you could walk me to my car? I mean, if there's somebody dangerous around. SECURITY GUARD All right, I guess. Where are you parked? ELLIE Just over there. She points with one hand, reaching her other hand into her purse. ELLIE Not far. They start walking. ELLIE draws the stungun from her purse. ELLIE Not far at all. CUT TO: 25. INTERIOR. SHOPPING MALL. NEIL walks past the OLD MAN, who is sitting on his bench. The OLD MAN glances up, sees NEIL, and then goes back to his newspaper. CUT TO: 26. EXTERIOR. PARKING LOT. The SECURITY GUARD is unconscious in the trunk of ELLIE's car, a red Jaguar. ELLIE throws the shopping bag on top of him, then slams the trunk closed. ELLIE Come for the damsel in distress; stay for the black widow. CUT TO: 27. EXTERIOR. NEIL's HOUSE. THAT EVENING. NEIL has an old, dark, three-story house on a tree-covered lot, all surrounded by a high fence. No other houses are visible through the trees. NEIL's Taurus pulls into the driveway and parks in the garage. CUT TO: 28. INTERIOR. NEIL's GARAGE. NEIL walks to the door that leads into the house. There are two peepholes installed in the door, one for looking in, and one for looking out. He looks into the house, then he unlocks multiple locks in the door. CUT TO: 29. INTERIOR. NEIL's KITCHEN. NEIL enters and locks the door behind him. He un-velcroes the cast from his arm, which is uninjured. He peers through a peephole in the basement door, which also has two peepholes installed, as do all the doors in the house. CUT TO: 30. INTERIOR. NEIL's BASEMENT. The basement lights go on. NEIL enters and walks down the stairs. The basement has been transformed into a dungeon, with two barred cells which are filled with old, ornate, wooden furniture, like an old living room and bedroom set. One of the cells is occupied by JAN, who is sitting on a large old bed. NEIL opens a closet, which is filled with clothes taken from his victims, as well as a pegboard hung with keys. He picks a blouse, skirt and high heels from the pile of clothes, which he then pushes through the bars of JAN's cell. NEIL I'm not going to kill you today. JAN Thanks. NEIL checks his watch: 8:07. NEIL Put these on. I'll be back in fifty-three minutes. NEIL leaves, and multiple locks turn in the door. JAN For nothing, asshole. CUT TO: 31. INTERIOR. NEIL's KITCHEN. SAME EVENING. NEIL is eating at his kitchen table. The chair across the table from him is an old dentist's chair, covered with various leather straps, chains, etc. NEIL's hunting knife is lying on the table, unsheathed. The clock ticks. JACKIE All right, already. Say something. You're killin' me here. Is tonight the night? The night of all nights? Is tonight showtime? The voice of JACKIE is NEIL's voice, but like a ventriloquist's. NEIL is trying to throw his voice as if the hunting knife is speaking, but his lips are moving, and he is pretty bad at it. He picks up the knife and talks to it. NEIL No. JACKIE What? Why not? Cripessake, she's been in the basement for six months already. NEIL Six weeks, Jackie. Six weeks. JACKIE Weeks. Months. What's the diff? I'm aching to kill her, Neil, buddy. I'm aching to breaking. NEIL Not tonight. JACKIE That's what you said last night. And the night before that. And the night... NEIL Not tonight. JACKIE It's the skirt from the mall, ain't it? She batted her big baby blues at you and twisted you around, mixed you all up, made you go all ga-ga in the ya-ya's, didn't she? NEIL No. She's not like that. She's different. She's... JACKIE She's meat, buddy. They're all nothin? but meat. Never been one different, and never will be. NEIL But... JACKIE Never a dame different in a million years, buddy. Have I ever lied to you? NEIL No. JACKIE Never have and never will, never in a million years. NEIL But she... JACKIE Never get your ya-ya's in a knot over a dame, Neil, pal-o-mine. What's a dame ever done for you? Dames is meat. That's the skinny, straight and simple. NEIL No. It's just not right, not tonight. JACKIE Speak for yourself, buddy. Anytime's a good time for Jackie Sexknife. Any time, I tell you, and for you, too. Just stick your yammy in her slammy already, and it'll all come back to you. NEIL I don't know. JACKIE Come on, pal. You know how a good gutting always makes you feel, right? Top o' the world. Hey, this is Jackie You're talkin' to. Can't put one over on your old pal Jackie. I know what You're thinkin' before you do, buddy. CUT TO: 32. INTERIOR. SHOPPING MALL. NEIL stands outside the lingerie store. The mall is empty. ELLIE exits the store, carrying a shopping bag. She draws a stungun. NEIL pulls a pistol. NEIL Gotcha. ELLIE Oh, You're good. You're real good. NEIL shoots ELLIE in the forehead. He kneels next to her corpse. He pushes his finger into the bullet-hole, swizzles it around, and then pulls it out with a small pop. He considers his finger for a moment, and then he sticks it into his mouth and sucks it clean. CUT TO: 33. INTERIOR. NEIL's KITCHEN. NEIL How the hell do cannibals do that kind of stuff? JACKIE A gun, buddy? A gun? When'd your old pal Jackie ever let you down? When'd you ever need a gun, buddy? NEIL I just thought I'd try something different. JACKIE Any mope can be a psychokiller with a gun. Guns dumb down the whole profession, buddy-boy. NEIL OK, OK. I'm sorry, all right? JACKIE It takes real commitment to be a killer with a knife. NEIL I said OK already. Gimme a break, willya, Jackie? JACKIE Yeah, sure. Sure, I'll give you a break. I'll give ya all the breaks in the world. Let's try it again. Sure. Let's try it again, why don't we? CUT TO: 34. INTERIOR. SHOPPING MALL. NEIL stands outside the lingerie shop. The mall is empty. ELLIE exits the store, carrying a shopping bag. She draws her stungun. NEIL draws Jackie. ELLIE instantly drops her stungun. ELLIE My, God! You've got the biggest knife I've ever seen. JACKIE Hey, I like this girl. NEIL rushes forward, slashing ELLIE to pieces. CUT TO: 35. INTERIOR. NEIL's KITCHEN. NEIL She could say that. JACKIE She's a smart cookie, buddy. She knows the score. CUT TO: 36. INTERIOR. SHOPPING MALL. NEIL is on his knees, his hands and Jackie all bloody. ELLIE is lying on the floor, bloody, dead, her eyes unblinking. ELLIE Ooooh, you are so totally masterful, Neil. Please cut me open. Let me have your knife. Bury your blade of manhood inside me. Ooooh. CUT TO: 37. INTERIOR. NEIL's KITCHEN. NEIL giggles. NEIL Yeah. Yeah. She could definitely say that. CUT TO: 38. INTERIOR. SHOPPING MALL. NEIL kneels over ELLIE, eyes closed, giggling. ELLIE blinks and looks at him. ELLIE Hey, dumbshit, don't go drifting off on me. Pay attention. I said, let me have your blade of manhood. What's the problem? You can't give a real woman your knife when she asks for it? You can't... CUT TO: 39. INTERIOR. NEIL's KITCHEN. NEIL is rocking back and forth in his chair, eyes closed, hands over his ears. Jackie is on the table. NEIL No, she's not real. She's not real. She's not... CUT TO: 40. INTERIOR. SHOPPING MALL. NEIL is kneeling. ELLIE is standing over him, dripping blood. ELLIE The hell I'm not. Open your eyes and look at me. And let me have your goddam blade of manhood already. An older woman, Neil's MOTHER, walks up and stands next to ELLIE. MOTHER What are you doing, Neil? She wants your knife, so why don't you just let her have it, already? ELLIE Men. They're all the same. MOTHER (to ELLIE) You see what he's like? For twenty years I had to put up with this. ELLIE (to MOTHER) Well, I wouldn't put up with it for twenty seconds. MOTHER Good for you, dear. He needs a strong woman in his life, every minute of his life, every second of his life. NEIL Mother. What are you doing here? You're dead. MOTHER Be quiet, Neil. We're talking. (to ELLIE) If I weren't inside his head, he'd never listen to me. NEIL This isn't real. Not real. No. MOTHER Of course I'm real, Neil. (to ELLIE) He used to wet his bed for the longest time. I finally had to give him a vinegar enema every time he lost control. 'You're going to let it out,' I said... ELLIE 'then I'm going to put it right back in.' MOTHER I like the way you think, dear. I put it right back in every day for a year, until he stopped, and then for a couple months after, just to make sure. And did he ever thank me, even once? ELLIE Of course not. MOTHER Of course not. NEIL Mother. Shut up. No one asked you anything. You're dead. MOTHER I may be dead, but at least I'm polite, and you still haven't given this nice young woman your knife. NEIL Mother! ELLIE (to MOTHER) Does he always start things he can't finish? NEIL Wait just a goddam minute. I'm in charge here. I say what happens. You can't just come inside my brain and start ordering me around. MOTHER Of course I can, Neil, and don't swear. ELLIE I'll bet his knife isn't really that big anyway. ELLIE holds two fingers about an inch apart. ELLIE and MOTHER start laughing. CUT TO: 41. INTERIOR. NEIL's KITCHEN. NEIL is standing at the sink, using JACKIE to carve smiley-faces into his left forearm. NEIL Turn a frown upside-down, and smile, smile, smile. JACKIE Oh, yeah, baby, he's got a knife. Yeah. He's got Jackie Sexknife. NEIL I'm in control. I am. Me. MOTHER (voice-over) Of course You're not, Neil. CUT TO: 42. INTERIOR. NEIL's BEDROOM. SECONDS LATER. NEIL rushes in. His MOTHER's corpse, completely wrapped in multiple shower-curtains, which are held in place with strips of duct tape, is lying on the bed. NEIL manhandles her into the closet. MOTHER If you can't be civil, then you can't sleep in the bed with me anymore. NEIL slams the closet door. MOTHER (voice-over) You'd probably just wet it anyway. CUT TO: 43. INTERIOR. NEIL's KITCHEN. NEIL is at the sink, cleaning off JACKIE. There is a bandage wrapped around his left forearm. JACKIE Oh, yeah, that's good. Rub me, buddy. Rub me harder. A cuckoo clock goes off in the living room. Six o'clock. JACKIE Time to go to the basement, buddy. Showtime. NEIL You're not going. He picks up JACKIE's leather sheath. JACKIE Whattaya talkin' about? Tonight's the night, ain't it? NEIL No. Not tonight. NEIL slips JACKIE into the sheath. JACKIE (muffled) Have a heart. At least use the whetstone on me, buddy. You can do that much for a pal, can'tcha? CUT TO: 44. INTERIOR. BASEMENT. NEIL stands in front of JAN's cell. JAN is wearing the clothes he gave her, but not the shoes. NEIL I'm not going to kill you today. JAN The shoes didn't fit. Too small. Honest. If you get me size nine's, I can wear them. I'd love to wear them. JAN holds one shoe in both hands and rubs it across her cheek. JAN Ooooh, I love to wear shoes that fit. NEIL Wear them anyway. JAN But... NEIL Just wear them, OK? Dangle them off your toes. Is that so much to ask? JAN sits, dangles. JAN OK. OK. NEIL I kill people, for Chrissakes. I'm cold-blooded. I don't empathize with other people's pain. I like other people's pain. I'm on edge. You'd think people would listen to me every once in a while. JAN I'm listening. See? I'm wearing. I'm dangling. NEIL stares at the shoes. NEIL No. Not working. Not the same. Tonight's not the night. JAN No, don't say that. It's great. Look how great these shoes are. Let me guess. You like shoes three sizes too small? You like big feet? NEIL Big feet? Of course not. Who likes big feet? JAN Sorry, sorry. You know, you sound conflicted. You shouldn't do anything that's irreversible when You're feeling conflicted. You know, like killing someone. NEIL You've never killed anyone, have you? JAN Absolutely not. NEIL What's that like? Not killing people? JAN It's great. Really. I'm telling that to my friends all the time. 'You shouldn't kill people. You shouldn't kill people.' I'm like a broken record, I'm so totally enthusiastic about not killing people. NEIL But what do you do with all your spare time? What do you do if it's not showtime? JAN TV is good. NEIL Uh-huh. JAN But not cable. Not Fox. No bad language or gratuitous sex or violence. CBS. You should watch CBS, or PAX. You should watch Touched by an Angel. NEIL OK. Thanks. CUT TO: 45. INTERIOR. NEIL's LIVING ROOM. LATER THAT EVENING. NEIL is in his easy chair, flipping channels. The room is filled with exercise equipment. A bookcase is filled with hundreds of cassette tapes. He comes across Touched by an Angel. He watches. CUT TO: 46. INTERIOR. NEIL's LIVING ROOM. NEIL is asleep in his easy chair, drooling. Touched by an Angel is still on. CUT TO: 47. INTERIOR. MALL. NEXT DAY. NEIL is loitering in front of the shoe store from which ELLIE's bag came. He checks his watch, then leaves. CUT TO: 48. EXTERIOR. NEIL's FRONT DOOR. NEXT MORNING. Multiple locks turn, and the door opens. NEIL rushes outside, dressed in a bathrobe, picks up his newspaper, then rushes back inside. CUT TO: 49. INTERIOR. KITCHEN. NEIL stands at the kitchen counter, turning the pages of the newspaper so hard and fast that he almost rips the paper each time. NEIL Why doesn't she kill someone already? CUT TO: 50. INTERIOR. MALL. NEXT DAY. NEIL paces in front of the shoe store. CUT TO: 51. INTERIOR. LIVING ROOM. NEXT EVENING. NEIL is pedaling on his exercise bike, curling a dumbbell in his right hand, flipping channels with the remote in his left. He clicks past a graphic on the news: STILETTO KILLER STRIKES AGAIN. He returns to that channel, stops curling, stops pedaling. A picture of the mall SECURITY GUARD is on the TV. NEIL Finally. CUT TO: 52. INTERIOR. BASEMENT. LATER THAT EVENING. NEIL enters. JAN rushes around, barefoot, looking for the shoes. NEIL I'm not going to kill you today. JAN stops in mid-crouch, holding one shoe. NEIL I think I found her. JAN What? NEIL I'm not going to kill you today. I think I found her. JAN You found who? NEIL I found her. You know... He indicates the shoe in JAN's hand, the clothes. NEIL ...her. The most perfect woman in the world. So you don't have to wear those any more. JAN You mean you had somebody other than me in mind when I was wearing this stuff? And now I don't have to bother any more because she's, like, 'the perfect woman'? What does that make me? A cheap substitute with big feet? NEIL Well, big feet, big arteries. JAN You mean I've been stuck down here for nothing? I've been locked up down here in this...this dungeon for a month, two months--I don't even know any more-- and I can't see the sun, and I can't see anything but bricks and bars, and I'm dirty, and scared, and alone, and you keep coming down here going... She imitates NEIL. 'I'm not going to kill you today. I'm not going to kill you today.' And I'm going all 'Oh, thank you, thank you,' and all the time I'm thinking, someday he's gonna come down here and not say it, and that means he's gonna kill me, and I'm only twenty-five, and I don't want to think about dying every day, and I'm not even the one you want? NEIL Well, yes...no... JAN I don't even want to hear it. I already know. You found her. Great. And now what am I supposed to be? Happy? Supportive? Grateful that you never even really wanted to kill me in the first place? Do you know how that makes me feel? NEIL But... JAN You were just using me to work yourself up to kill someone else. I'm a test victim. A rehearsal murder. Practice torture. NEIL No. I really wanted to kill you. JAN don't flatter me. don't bullshit me. Me! This is about my feelings. I'm supposed to be the star here. Before, at least I thought I was special. You could've taken some other woman on another block, but, no, you took me. Me! Ooooh! You wanted to cut me up, to dismember me, to dissect me. NEIL I...still could. JAN There was something so disturbing, so threatening, so earth-shattering about me that you had to kill me. At least I had that thought to hang onto. But that's not what happened at all, was it? NEIL I...you... JAN I was just...just...random. NEIL But... JAN Why don't you just make me wear a paper bag over my head? Hey, better yet, why don't you toss me a knife and I'll slit my own throat, OK? NEIL No. I decide...I JAN Of course, you'll still have to haul my dead, lifeless corpse to the shallow grave by yourself, but, hey, I'm sorry, I can't do everything. NEIL tries to speak, but can't. He turns and runs for the stairs. JAN Hey, asshole, next time at least kidnap someone who wears the same goddam perfect size shoes your perfect goddam woman wears, or maybe just kill me already and start over fresh with someone who has smaller feet. JAN throws the shoe at NEIL, bouncing it off his back. NEIL runs out of the basement. CUT TO: 53. INTERIOR. KITCHEN. NEIL leans against the basement door, eyes closed, lightly banging his forehead against the wood. JAN (offscreen) Hey, asshole! NEIL bangs harder, faster. JAN (offscreen) If you were any kind of man at all, You'd come down here and rape me right now. NEIL stops banging his head and checks the peephole. A few seconds pass. JAN (offscreen) Pansy! CUT TO: 54. INTERIOR. MALL. THE NEXT DAY. NEIL watches the shoe store. He isn't wearing the fake cast. His headphones are hanging around his neck. ELLIE exits the store, carrying a shopping bag. She heads for the same exit as before, looking over her shoulder occasionally. She pushes through the door, stumbles, pretends to twist her ankle. She whirls around with stungun and stiletto as the door shuts behind her. NEIL waves at her from the other side of the door. NEIL Hi. ELLIE opens the door partway. ELLIE What are you doing here? NEIL I was following you. ELLIE I know that. don't. It's creepy. Unless...do you want me to gouge out your eyes and kill you? NEIL Not exactly. ELLIE Oh. Well, what then? NEIL Um...would you like to...I mean... I wanted to ask...if maybe we... you and me, I mean...we...if maybe we could...you know...if You'd like to...you know... ELLIE Are you asking me for a date? NEIL Uh, yeah. ELLIE I don't... NEIL No knives or anything, right? No stunguns. No weapons at all. Unarmed. Completely. You know... a regular date. You and me. Us. What do you think? ELLIE waits a beat. ELLIE Oh, hell. Why not? You did say unarmed? NEIL Completely. ELLIE OK, then. 'Unarmed' means no weapons of any kind, right? NEIL None at all. Cross my heart and hope to die of anything other than a lethal injection or a hail of police bullets. ELLIE OK, then. OK. NEIL Great. Tonight? Dinner? Eight? ELLIE Yeah, sure, OK. We're going to a restaurant, right? You're not cooking? NEIL Yes. Whatever you like. How about Serengeti's? ELLIE Fine. By the way, what's your name? I can't very well call you 'Rapist.' NEIL Neil. I'm Neil. ELLIE I'm Ellie. NEIL That's a pretty name. ELLIE It's an alias. NEIL Well, it's a pretty alias. Where should I pick you up? ELLIE You don't drive a soundproofed 1979 van with the windows painted black and no door-handles on the inside of the passenger door so I can't get out and a bare mattress in the back with handcuffs at the four corners or anything like that, do you? Because I hate that. NEIL No. I have a Taurus. Very normal. It's best to blend in. ELLIE That's true, but, no offense, I wouldn't be caught dead in a Taurus. I'll pick you up. NEIL Fine. Great. I live at 2042 Ridge. In Evanston. ELLIE You don't still live with your mother, do you? NEIL No. She's dead. ELLIE I'll repeat my question. You don't still live with your mother, do you? You're not a taxidermist or something? NEIL Uh...no. Mother's dead. She's... buried. In a cemetery. By a mortician. In a coffin. A very nice coffin. All of her. Has been since she died. Of a heart attack. And no knives were involved in any way. And neither was I. ELLIE Just checking. I'll see you tonight then. At eight. Unarmed. NEIL Totally. Swear to God. I'm looking forward to it. ELLIE Sure. Me, too. Well, bye. NEIL Bye. ELLIE leaves. NEIL re-enters the mall. He puts on his headphones and turns on the Walkman. He smiles. CUT TO: 55. INTERIOR. LIVING ROOM. LATER THAT DAY. NEIL is sitting on his exercise bike, but he's not pedaling. He grips JACKIE in one hand. NEIL OK, OK, all you have to do is be yourself. CUT TO: 56. EXTERIOR. PARKING LOT. EIGHT MONTHS PREVIOUS. NEIL drags a CO-ED towards his car with JACKIE at her throat. CUT TO: 57. INTERIOR. LIVING ROOM. NEIL sits on his exercise bike, eyes closed, rocking back and forth. NEIL No, no. Christ, no. don't be yourself. Be natural, like other people are natural. Not too much feeling; not too little. Not a monotone; not theatrical. Not crazy; not bland. Just concentrate on being relaxed. Very. Normal. JACKIE You can do it, buddy. She's nothing special. Just another dizzy broad who happens to be a serial killerette. Dime a dozen, buddy. NEIL Just another serial killer. Just another dropdead gorgeous serial killer with the mother of all trophies pouting down between her legs. JACKIE Yeah, that's right. A little dinner, some vino, cut a rug or two, and then it's showtime, right, pal? Then it's time for the Jackie Sexknife Show. Here's Jackie! NEIL No. JACKIE What? Whaddya mean, no? NEIL I mean no, no. No. No Showtime. No Jackie. No. N-O. No. JACKIE But... NEIL We're dating. This is a date. JACKIE A date? Did I hear you right, or am I just crazy? A date? NEIL I can date if I want to. I don't have to clean and dress every woman I meet. JACKIE Who said anything about every woman? Just the broads, the dames, the skirts, the dolls. Just the cigarette-smokin', foul-mouthed, whiskey-breathed bitches. Just the carnie women, the cold-eyed backstabbers, the doxies, the skanks, the tomatoes. Just most women. Leave the nuns alone if you want, for cripesake. NEIL No. It's just a date. JACKIE Try and keep up with me here, buddy. Do you remember your last date? NEIL That wasn't representative. JACKIE No. You just always feel like cleaning me off and re-sharpening me after a date. NEIL It's not like I don't know how to have fun unless You're around. I've had some great dates in my time. JACKIE Really? 58. INTERIOR. LIVING ROOM. NEIL stands in front of his bookcase. JACKIE is stuck into the wall at head-height. Four or five cassette tapes labeled 'DATING' have been piled on one of the shelves. NEIL slides another tape into his stereo and plays it. His own voice comes over the speakers. NEIL (on tape) September 21, 1982. I asked out Jennifer Fenger today. She said no. October 19, 1982. I asked out Becky Brill today. She said no. December 3, 1982. I asked out Sandy Calder today. She said no, and then she laughed at me. JACKIE Hey, Casanova, how many more of these do we have to listen to? NEIL Shut up, Jackie. JACKIE Pardon me for breathing. NEIL (on tape) May 8, 1983. I asked out Penny Wortham today. She said no, and then she laughed at me. June 5, 1983. I asked out Keri Stamp today. She said no. Positives: she didn't laugh. July 16, 1983. I asked out Carly Rubin today. She said yes. NEIL See? JACKIE Do you remember Carly Rubin? NEIL (on tape) July 16, 1983. PM. Carly called. She said she thought I was someone else, or she wouldn't have agreed to go out with me. Now that she remembers who I am, she's changed her mind. She said no, then she laughed at me. Positives: none. JACKIE I sure didn't see that one coming. NEIL Shut up, Jackie. NEIL (on tape) September 9, 1983. I asked out Stephanie Cavallo today. She said no, and then she laughed at me, so I killed her. Positives: I had fun. I didn't get caught. JACKIE I liked Stephanie. She was so... squishy. NEIL yanks JACKIE out of the wall and sheathes him. JACKIE (muffled) Oh, yeah, sure, like you didn't think she was squishy too. CUT TO: 59. INTERIOR. LIVING ROOM. NEIL stands by the bookcase. A larger pile of tapes is heaped on the shelf. NEIL Maybe there's something under 'CONVERSATION'. MOTHER (voice-over) Of course there isn't, Neil. If you knew anything about relating to women, would you have cells in the basement and a dentist's chair covered with leather straps in the kitchen? NEIL Shut up, Mother. Do you want to go back into the crawlspace again? Do you? MOTHER (voice-over) Pardon me. I was just offering a little constructive criticism. NEIL Well, don't. If you don't have anything nice to say, then don't say anything at all. MOTHER (voice-over) Fine. NEIL Fine. CUT TO: 60. INTERIOR. KITCHEN. JAN is strapped into the dentist's chair. She is gagged. NEIL turns on his tape recorder. NEIL Practice date. Take one. NEIL prepares himself to practice. He ungags JAN. JAN inhales deeply. NEIL's hand hovers over JACKIE, sheathed on the table. JAN exhales slowly. JAN So, you know when I yelled at you? I'm so totally sorry about that. I was in such a bad mood, my own little serial killer time of the month. You know us women; we're all crazy. NEIL Hi, Ellie. It's great to see you. You... JAN So, what I really meant to say was, as long as you don't feel like killing me, then cool! NEIL I'm not going to kill you today, OK? NEIL prepares himself to practice again. NEIL Practice date. Take two. Hi, Ellie! It's great to see you. You sure look all...leathery and scrumptious tonight. JAN Leathery and scrumptious? NEIL Yes. Leathery and scrumptious. don't laugh. JAN Who's laughing? Look, unless you plan to have her strapped into this chair, then the 'leathery' comment is going to go right over her head, right? And scrumptious? Do you plan on eating her? don't answer that. NEIL Hi, Ellie. You're sure looking all... very...well-rested tonight. JAN Well-rested? NEIL OK, OK. I haven't dated a lot lately. JAN Really? NEIL Hi, Ellie. (He sniffs.) Say, do I smell something on you? Like perfume, I mean, or something, because you smell really great, you know, otherwise I wouldn't have mentioned it, if you smelled bad, I mean, which you don't. Really. JAN Say, 'Hi, Ellie. You look beautiful.' NEIL Hi, Ellie. You look beautiful. CUT TO: 61. INTERIOR. BASEMENT. LATER. NEIL runs down the stairs. He is dressed in a white shirt, a skinny tie, black pants and white high-top gym shoes. JAN is in her cell. NEIL I have a question. JAN Hi, Ellie. You look beautiful. NEIL No, not that. It's an important question. JAN Definitely use a condom. NEIL No, no. Very, very important. Not impotent. JAN What? NEIL poses. NEIL How do I look? JAN Uh...super. NEIL Really? He checks his watch. NEIL She's picking me up in twelve minutes. It's important that everything's perfect. Totally perfect. So, do I really look super? JAN Super...except...no, super. NEIL What? JAN Nothing. NEIL What? JAN Well...that shirt. NEIL What's wrong with my shirt? JAN Nothing. Nothing at all. But if you want to make a good impression, maybe you should consider going out and killing some guy with more up-to-date taste and wearing his clothes, like maybe Huey Lewis? NEIL But...but...(He checks his watch.) eleven minutes. JAN Sorry. Sorry. But really, high-tops? Are you planning on having to run this girl down at some point during the evening? NEIL But...They're comfortable. I have bad feet. And they go with the pants. don't they? JAN You look like your mother dressed you. In 1983. CUT TO: 62. INTERIOR. BEDROOM. NEIL is yanking off his clothes. MOTHER's corpse is leaning against a wall in the closet. There are huge piles of clothes heaped on the bed. NEIL You deliberately tried to sabotage my date, didn't you, Mother? MOTHER (voice-over) Of course not, Neil. You asked me what you should wear. If your victim's opinion is more important to you than your Mother's, then, by all means, listen to the little tramp. And besides, Neil, You're a grown man now. You shouldn't have to ask your mother for advice about how to dress in the first place. You're really quite hopeless sometimes. And another thing... CUT TO: 63. INTERIOR. STAIRS TO THE ATTIC. NEIL carries his MOTHER's corpse up the stairs. He checks the peephole, opens the door, and carries her into the attic. There is a heavy thump inside, and NEIL rushes back down the stairs without MOTHER. CUT TO: 64. INTERIOR. BEDROOM. NEIL scoops two armfuls of clothes from the bed and runs out the door. CUT TO: 65. INTERIOR. BASEMENT. NEIL holds up various combinations of clothes in front of himself. JAN gives each combination either a thumb's-down or a shoulder shrug. NEIL checks his watch. NEIL Six minutes. Six minutes. He holds up another combination. JAN nods. He holds JACKIE's sheath in front of the pants. JAN wrinkles her nose. He holds JACKIE's sheath underneath the shirt. JAN shakes her head. He throws JACKIE onto the pile of clothes. JAN gives a double thumb's-up. NEIL Good? JAN Great. NEIL Great. (He checks his watch.) Four minutes. Oh, I'm not going to kill you today, but if you make any noise when Ellie comes over, I'll come down here and cut out your tongue, OK? And thanks for all the help. NEIL runs out of the basement, not checking the peephole as he leaves. JAN You're welcome. Asshole. CUT TO: 66. EXTERIOR. NEIL's DRIVEWAY. ELLIE pulls into the driveway in her Jaguar. The car stops, and the headlights and engine shut off. The interior light goes on. CUT TO: 67. INTERIOR. LIVING ROOM. NEIL runs through the living room, pulling off clothes. NEIL Just another serial killer. Just another serial killer. CUT TO: 68. INTERIOR. ELLIE's JAGUAR. ELLIE isn't dressed to kill. She takes a series of prescription bottles out of her purse and puts them back. She opens the glove box and picks through more prescription bottles until she finds the one she wants. She pours some pills into her palm and slugs them back with a drink from a flask in her purse. ELLIE Come for the rush, but stay for the high. Nothing like vicodin. Gotta love vicodin. CUT TO: 69. INTERIOR. BEDROOM. NEIL Hi, Ellie. You look beautiful. Hi, Ellie. You sure look really beautiful. CUT TO: 70. INTERIOR. JAGUAR. ELLIE pulls her stiletto out of her purse, flicks it open, retracts it, and replaces it in her purse. She pulls her stungun from its hiding place under the left-hand side of her seat, practices quickdrawing it a few times, then replaces it as well. ELLIE OK, money, lipstick, drugs, booze, weapons, and a change of clothes and 5-inch Manolo heels in the trunk, just in case I get lucky. OK. I'm ready. CUT TO: 71. INTERIOR. LIVING ROOM. NEIL sniffs his underarms. He checks his breath. The doorbell rings. MOTHER (voice-over) Too late. NEIL Shut up, Mother. The doorbell rings again. NEIL OK. don't kill her. Hi, Ellie. You look beautiful. Just don't kill her. CUT TO: 72. EXTERIOR. FRONT DOOR. ELLIE stands in front of the door. ELLIE Everything's all right. Just don't kill him. You're just going to dinner. That's all. Dinner. I only kill him if he tries to kill me first. That's it. Otherwise, just dinner. CUT TO: 73. INTERIOR. LIVING ROOM. NEIL opens the front door. NEIL Hi, Ellie. You look...different. ELLIE Uh, thanks. Well, I'm here. NEIL Yeah. Would you like to...uh... come inside? ELLIE No, not really. NEIL OK, then. I'll just get my coat, and we can go. NEIL goes inside. ELLIE sees all the exercise equipment. She walks over to the Nautilus. ELLIE This is great, Neil. I have to go to a health club, all those men staring at me like I'm a piece of meat. NEIL Thanks. It's quiet too. Nobody can hear anything I do in here. I mean... it's really quiet. There's no voices, you know, from outside. So...do you want to get going? ELLIE You've got somebody here, don't you? You've got somebody here right now. She looks around, sniffs the air. ELLIE I can smell her. I'd love to watch you kill her, if I wouldn't be intruding. NEIL Uh... ELLIE Sorry. Sorry. It's a very private thing. But maybe...you could videotape it for me? I'd love to see how you do things. I'd really love to feel her skin while she's in pain, and...sorry, sorry. It's just that I've never done a woman before. NEIL Hi, Ellie! You look beautiful. Do you want to go to dinner now? CUT TO: 74. INTERIOR. BASEMENT. JAN hears the tail-end of a conversation between NEIL and ELLIE filtering down through the closed door, not the words, just the voices. She hears footsteps, then a door slam, then silence. CUT TO: 75. INTERIOR. SERENGETI's. Serengeti's is a trendy restaurant, so trendy it almost visibly goes out of style during the course of a meal. NEIL and ELLIE are sitting at a table for two. The waiter, SASHA, is filling ELLIE's glass with wine. He is wearing a tasteful dog collar. SASHA I'll be back in a moment with your appetizers. SASHA leaves. ELLIE is drinking the wine almost before the glass is filled. NEIL So... ELLIE So... NEIL Well... CUT TO: 76. INTERIOR. HIGH SCHOOL HALLWAY. SEPTEMBER 9, 1983. NEIL is dressed almost exactly as he was for his date with ELLIE before JAN changed him. STEPHANIE CAVALLO, a cheerleader type, is standing at her locker. NEIL So, uh...Stephanie...Steph...um... would you like to...I mean...I wanted to ask...if maybe we...you and me...I mean...we...if maybe we could...you know...if You'd like to...you know... STEPHANIE Go out? NEIL Yeah. It'd be...rad. STEPHANIE A date? With yew? Oh, my gawd! She laughs at NEIL, then controls herself. STEPHANIE Gag me with a spoon. She starts laughing again. NEIL snaps for the first time in his life. NEIL hits her. She falls and stops laughing. NEIL pulls out a brand-new JACKIE and starts stabbing STEPHANIE. NEIL You're supposed to date a variety of people in high school in order to gain a wealth of experience. It's not nice to laugh. It's...it's... JACKIE ...it's time for the Jackie Sexknife Show! CUT TO: 77. INTERIOR. SERENGETI's. NEIL is fiddling with his dinner knife. NEIL Do you like shows? ELLIE Shows? NEIL Shows. TV shows. Musical shows. News shows. Game shows. Shows. She drinks the rest of her wine. ELLIE Not really. NEIL Me neither. CUT TO: 78. INTERIOR. SERENGETI's. NEIL is sitting at a table for two. ELLIE is sitting across from him, strapped into a dentist's chair. SASHA feeds her sips of wine directly from the bottle. CUT TO: 79. INTERIOR. SERENGETI's. NEIL and ELLIE sit at a table for two. ELLIE drinks. NEIL So, have you been to the dentist lately? ELLIE Uh...no. You? NEIL No, not me. People go to the dentist all the time, though. ELLIE Yes, they do. ELLIE drinks. NEIL I thought maybe that would be something we might have in common, going to the dentist, and I guess it is, sort of, but not going, I mean. ELLIE I guess. NEIL But I guess going to the dentist bothers you, being a woman, I mean. Having a man stick things down your throat, kind of like a gynecological exam in your mouth, and, you know, maybe you could demonstrate how an exam works for me sometime, because, in my experience, women don't like having things stuck inside them, although I guess a dentist's drill isn't quite the same thing as, you know, the things I stick into women... CUT TO: 80. INTERIOR. BASEMENT. JAN stretches her arm through the bars, trying to reach the pile of clothes with JACKIE lying on top. CUT TO: 81. INTERIOR. SERENGETI's. NEIL Women don't really like me, and it's not like I go around telling them about the rape and the torture... ELLIE Uh-huh. (She holds up her empty glass for SASHA to see. SASHA comes with more wine.) NEIL ...but I guess they figure it out for themselves, really, because it's kind of hard to keep it a secret after the kidnapping and handcuffing and getting stuffed into a trunk and thrown into a cell in my basement, by which point they've usually figured it out for themselves, like I said, so, tell me, have you ever been raped? SASHA Smooth. CUT TO: 82. INTERIOR. BASEMENT. JAN uses a high-heel shoe to reach the pile of clothes. She drags the clothes, and JACKIE, over to the bars. CUT TO: 83. INTERIOR. SERENGETI's. ELLIE Me? Raped? Hell, no. Never. No one ever raped me. No one. Ever. I'd never let anyone rape me again... SASHA returns with the appetizers. ELLIE I don't get raped. I don't know what you?ve heard on radio, read in the papers or seen on TV, but it's not true, none of it, no matter what that little bastard of a psychiatrist says. SASHA Would you like to order now? Or should I come back in a little while, when You're sane? ELLIE No. I'd like to leave now. CUT TO: 84. INTERIOR. BASEMENT. JAN picks JACKIE off the pile and then begins to root through the rest of the clothes. She finds NEIL's fake cast. CUT TO: 85. INTERIOR. SERENGETI's. NEIL and ELLIE get up to leave. NEIL drops a handful of change on the table for a tip. SASHA comes by after they leave. SASHA Oh, sir, this is much too generous. Please, I'm a masochist. Take back the quarter. And be sure to come back soon and abuse me some more! CUT TO: 86. INTERIOR. JAGUAR. NEIL and ELLIE are driving back to NEIL's house. NEIL Was it something I said? ELLIE No. It's just psychiatrists. NEIL Goddam psychiatrists. ELLIE And that waiter. NEIL Goddam waiters. ELLIE Did you see how that waiter was looking at me? NEIL Not exactly. I don't pay too much attention to men. ELLIE Like I was a thing. NEIL I pay attention to women mostly. ELLIE It was all he could do not to rape me right there on the table. NEIL Really? Women can see that sort of thing coming? CUT TO: 87. INTERIOR. BASEMENT. JAN inspects the fake cast, seeing the signature of BECCA DiORIO. CUT TO: 88. EXTERIOR. PARKING LOT. SIX WEEKS PREVIOUS. JAN is walking to her car. Two hands reach around from behind her, one in a cast, holding a knife at her throat. There are signatures on the cast. CUT TO: 89. INTERIOR. JAN's KITCHEN. SIX MONTHS PREVIOUS. JAN is eating breakfast and reading the newspaper. She turns a page and stops briefly at a headline: CASSETTE RAPIST STRIKES AGAIN, which is accompanied by a small, captioned photo of REBECCA DiORIO. CUT TO: 90. INTERIOR. JAGUAR. ELLIE The first one, his eyes were like deer in headlights. His eyes reflected me. Nothing existed outside of what I was doing to him. It was almost as if he wasn't a separate person anymore, just a facet of my own desires. NEIL You look at eyes? I don't. Women's eyes aren't interesting or sexy or forbidden. Nobody ever puts clothes over eyes. ELLIE That waiter, for example. I could take everything away from him: his job, his wife, his manhood, everything. It's the only really satisfying way to rape a man: by taking away all his shiny boy-stuff, to show him I'm on top. NEIL I like voices. Sounds. I like peeling a woman's words off like clothes and getting down to the animal sounds underneath. ELLIE What's best is when I get some guy with total seamless complacency in his eyes, complacency dilated so wide that he can't even imagine the world without him on top. NEIL A bullwhip strips away words real good. ELLIE Ignorant, happy, empty, secure, oblivious, bovine-satisfied men with their own power crackling in their eyes like static, so they can't focus on anything but their own supposed superiority. NEIL Bullwhips are cool. ELLIE Men who think with their pricks, as if there are any men who don't think with their pricks. They pull into NEIL's driveway. CUT TO: 91. INTERIOR. BASEMENT. JAN inspects the other signatures, SHARI WOJCIK, JULIETTE CERRANO, DEBBIE FERRIS. CUT TO: 92. INTERIOR. JAN's APARTMENT. JAN glances at a picture of SHARI WOJCIK in the newspaper. The headline says: ANOTHER CASSETTE RAPIST VICTIM? CUT TO: 93. INTERIOR. JAN's APARTMENT. JAN watches TV, a news story titled JULIETTE CERRANO MISSING. CUT TO: 94. INTERIOR. JAN's APARTMENT. JAN turns on the radio. RADIO ANNOUNCER The body of Deborah Ferris, missing for two months, was found in a dumpster on north Sedgewick last night... CUT TO: 95. INTERIOR. BASEMENT. JAN throws the cast in a corner. JAN (screaming) You son of a bitch! CUT TO: 96. INTERIOR. NEIL's KITCHEN. JAN (offscreen, faintly) You son of a bitch! CUT TO: 97. EXTERIOR. NEIL's HOUSE. Everything is quiet. CUT TO: 98. INTERIOR. JAGUAR. NEIL My victims appreciate their lives more because of me. I can hear it in their voices before they die. They're thankful. ELLIE Of course they are. NEIL We're doing them a favor. ELLIE Try explaining that to a psychiatrist. NEIL Or the police. ELLIE They don't know the first thing about pain. NEIL Or whips. Or knives. ELLIE Or how enough pain can make you do anything. NEIL Absolutely anything. ELLIE They're really better off dead than alive. NEIL The little sluts. ELLIE You know, Neil, I had a really nice time tonight. CUT TO: 99. INTERIOR. BASEMENT. JAN unsheathes JACKIE. JAN He won't get me without a fight. The front door upstairs opens and shuts. Footsteps enter the living room. CUT TO: 100. INTERIOR. LIVING ROOM. The lights are off. NEIL Has anybody ever told you that your eyes shine like the blade of a newly honed stiletto? ELLIE No one. NEIL Like a perfect edge. Just before the first time it's used. ELLIE I've never met anyone like you, Neil. You're like...Hugh Grant with a bloodlust. NEIL And You're like...what's her name. You know, that girl...in that movie... with, you know, Hugh Grant. ELLIE Julia Roberts. NEIL Yes. You really understand me. ELLIE Oh, Neil. You're a man. You think with your prick. Of course I understand you. CUT TO: 101. INTERIOR. BASEMENT. JAN listens, but hears nothing more. She shoves the pile of clothes out of the cell to where it was before. CUT TO: 102. INTERIOR. LIVING ROOM. The lights are still off. NEIL turns on his stereo, searches through his collection of tapes, and pops one in. The tape plays: a woman screaming, being whipped, screaming more. NEIL turns. ELLIE has stripped to her underwear and thrown her clothes on the floor in a pile. ELLIE Just knowing you've got a woman stashed here in the house somewhere makes me feel so...dirty. CUT TO: 103. INTERIOR. BASEMENT. The muffled sound of a woman screaming fills the basement. JAN pulls the table away from the wall and begins to saw at the back of one of the table-legs with JACKIE. CUT TO: 104. INTERIOR. LIVING ROOM. The lights are still off. NEIL and ELLIE are slow-dancing to the screaming and whipping. CUT TO: 105. INTERIOR. LIVING ROOM. The lighted bar-graphs on the stereo's equalizer jump up and down with increasing tempo as the whipping and screaming also increases. ELLIE (offscreen) No, no, Neil, wait, stop. Let me get on top...let me...OK, OK, that's perfect. NEIL giggles. CUT TO: 106. INTERIOR. BASEMENT. JAN splits off a piece of the table-leg. She whittles it to a point with JACKIE. The upstairs screaming increases in tempo. CUT TO: 107. INTERIOR. LIVING ROOM. The lights are still out. NEIL shuts off the tape. NEIL That...that was skyrockets, Ellie. Trains-going-through-tunnels wonderful. That was like shooting fifteen people all at once in a McDonald's and getting away with it. That was really...swell. ELLIE kneels next to her clothes and starts to dress. NEIL watches her. CUT TO: 108. INTERIOR. BASEMENT. SEVERAL HOURS PREVIOUS. NEIL's clothes are sitting in a pile next to him. He drops JACKIE on the top of the pile. CUT TO: 109. INTERIOR. LIVING ROOM. ELLIE's pile of clothes is sitting on the floor. NEIL Jackie! CUT TO: 110. INTERIOR. BASEMENT. NEIL runs down the stairs, pulling on his pants. JACKIE is lying on the pile of clothes. NEIL grabs JACKIE, unsheathes him, inspects him. NEIL Did you touch Ja...anything? JAN glances at her bed. The stake she has whittled is sticking out from under the pillow. NEIL Did you touch anything? JAN edges over to the bed. JAN No. NEIL You tried. You tried to touch the knife, didn't you? JAN Of course I tried. You wanted me to try. You left it there--you left it just out of reach--so I would try; so I would fail. ELLIE claps from the top of the stairs. NEIL looks. JAN sits on the bed, shoving the stake all the way under the pillow. ELLIE Outstanding manipulation, Neil. Tantalize her. Frustrate her. (ELLIE sniffs.) I can smell the desperation. NEIL Oh...yeah. I meant to do that. It's just this...psychological thing that I do. ELLIE You're a naughty, naughty boy, Neil. JAN He's a bastard. ELLIE No one asked you. NEIL Yeah. ELLIE So, Neil, aren't you going to introduce us? NEIL Uh...Ellie, this is...Jane. JAN Jan. My name is Jan. You're going to kill me and you can't even remember my name? ELLIE She's feisty. NEIL She wasn't when I got her. ELLIE looks around the basement. ELLIE You decorated yourself? JAN Can't you see all the little psychotic touches? ELLIE notices JACKIE. ELLIE My God, Neil, that's the biggest knife I've ever seen. NEIL Thanks. JAN Oh, please. ELLIE Tell me, Neil. Are you going to kill 'Jane' tonight? JACKIE twitches in NEIL's hand. He sheathes the knife. NEIL No. Not tonight. ELLIE Are you sure? JAN One date and already she's trying to run your life. ELLIE Shut up. JAN You shut up. ELLIE reaches for the stiletto in her purse, but the purse is still in the living room. NEIL Both of you shut up. NEIL fidgets with JACKIE. JAN's hand hovers over the pillow. ELLIE I have to go now. ELLIE starts to leave. NEIL Can I... ELLIE I'll call you. NEIL But you don't have... ELLIE I took your number off your phone. NEIL Swell. That's swell. NEIL and ELLIE leave the basement. JAN She won't call. CUT TO: 111. INTERIOR. DANSE MACABRE NIGHTCLUB. LATER THAT NIGHT. ELLIE sits at the bar, watching the dance floor. Deafening music and colored strobes fill the club. She has changed into the killer clothes she had in her trunk. She sees KURT, who is drunk and dancing by himself. She leaves the bar and dances toward him. CUT TO: 112. INTERIOR. NEIL's BEDROOM. LATER THAT NIGHT. NEIL is lying on his bed. NEIL So, what did you think of her? JACKIE She's a real looker. NEIL She's beautiful. JACKIE Nice set of lungs. NEIL Really beautiful. JACKIE Bet she'll be a real screamer when we cut her up. NEIL We're not cutting her up. JACKIE What? I think I'm going deaf. What? NEIL You heard me. JACKIE You have two dames and You're not going to cut up either one of 'em? NEIL No. Well, yes. We'll cut up Jane. JACKIE Jan. NEIL Whatever. We'll kill her eventually. But not Ellie. JACKIE Neil. Buddy. Pal. They're just dames. Both of 'em. NEIL Ellie's not a dame. JACKIE I can't believe what I'm hearin'. NEIL Ellie's not like other women. JACKIE They're all the same when They're screaming. NEIL Not Ellie. JACKIE One date and she's got you twisted around inside. NEIL It's not like that. Ellie's special. JACKIE Aw, cripes. You already got a bad case of the specials. NEIL Enough. NEIL sheathes JACKIE. JACKIE Quick, better go make sure the toilet seat's down. CUT TO: 113. EXTERIOR. DANSE MACABRE PARKING LOT. ELLIE and KURT approach ELLIE's Jag. She opens the door for him. CUT TO: 114. INTERIOR. NEIL's BEDROOM. NEIL is still lying on his bed. MOTHER (voice-over) It wasn't any good for her, Neil. She wouldn't have left if it had been any good for her. Take it from a woman. You weren't good enough. NEIL Shut up, Mother. MOTHER (voice-over) don't blame me for your inadequacies. You should have engaged in more foreplay, but you were only interested in your own disgusting pleasure. You should have... NEIL I have matches and gasoline, Mother, and I'm not afraid to use them. MOTHER (voice-over) Fine. NEIL Fine. CUT TO: 115. INTERIOR. BASEMENT. NEIL enters the basement. JAN is sitting on the bed, hand near pillow. NEIL Tell me about foreplay. JAN I'm in a cell. You have a knife. I'm a sure thing. NEIL Not with you. How much foreplay does a woman expect? In minutes. It's not more than minutes, is it? JAN Three hours. NEIL Hours? JAN Not a minute less. CUT TO: 116. INTERIOR. JAGUAR. ELLIE and Kurt are parked in a secluded spot. KURT leans over to try and kiss ELIE. ELLIE draws her stungun and zaps KURT. ELLIE starts the car and drives off. CUT TO: 117. EXTERIOR. MOVIE THEATER. ONE WEEK LATER. NEIL and ELLIE exit the theater, hand in hand, heading for the Jaguar parked across the street. The theater marquee says: SILENCE OF THE LAMBS; PSYCHO; MIDNIGHT SHOW TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE. NEIL mimes the shower-scene-stabbing motion with his free hand, and they both break up laughing. CUT TO: 118. INTERIOR. NEIL's BEDROOM. THAT EVENING. The bedroom is dark. A tape is playing screaming on the living room stereo, turned up loud. NEIL and ELLIE are in bed. ELLIE Is that a carrot, honeybunny, or are you just glad to see me? NEIL giggles. CUT TO: 119. EXTERIOR. L'AMOUR NOIR CLUB. LATER THAT EVENING. ELLIE, dressed to kill, walks across the parking lot with STEVE, who is drunk. ELLIE opens the car door for him. CUT TO: 120. INTERIOR. BEDROOM. WEEKS LATER. ELLIE is in bed. NEIL enters, carrying a cake with a single candle. NEIL Surprise. ELLIE What's this for, honeybunny? NEIL leans the cake forward: HAPPY ONE MONTH ANNIVERSARY. ELLIE You remembered. NEIL I make notes. ELLIE You mean I'm on your cassette tapes? NEIL Under 'DATING'. A whole side for our first date. ELLIE Oh, Neil. That's so beautifully... obsessive. NEIL I was thinking that maybe I should switch over to the L's soon. ELLIE You mean because you...like me? NEIL I love you, Ellie. ELLIE reaches under the bed and pulls out a small present. ELLIE Happy One-Month Anniversary, honeybunny. NEIL sets down the cake, then takes a present from behind his back. NEIL Ditto, purry-kitty. NEIL's gift is a badge in a leather cover. ELLIE It's authentic. I took it from an authentic security guard. If you flash that around the mall, women will line up to do what you tell them to do. They'll all think You're a cop. Women love to obey authority. NEIL Thanks. It's great. Hey, look at me. Officer Neil. I order you to open yours now. ELLIE unwraps an icepick. ELLIE Oh, Neil. It's beautiful. NEIL When I saw it, I thought of you. ELLIE Fuck protecting me, Officer Neil. Just serve me. Now. CUT TO: 121. EXTERIOR. DANSE MACABRE. LATER THAT EVENING. ELLIE's Jaguar sits in the parking lot. CUT TO: 122. INTERIOR. NEIL's KITCHEN. A FEW DAYS LATER. NEIL and ELLIE are sitting at the table. NEIL I want you to have the keys for the house. You can use the basement any time you like. ELLIE Thanks, honeybunny. NEIL hands ELLIE a keyring with twenty or thirty color-coded keys on it. NEIL The three blue ones are for the locks on the front door. The red ones are for the back door. The green ones are for the basement door. The pink one is for the bedroom. The purple one's for the closet in the bedroom. The silver one is for the bathroom. The fuchsia one's for the medicine cabinet. Olive for the refrigerator. Orange for the laundry room. Gold for the interior garage door. Bronze for the exterior garage door. ELLIE It's like a whole rainbow of trust. NEIL hands ELLIE a laminated piece of paper. NEIL This is a list of the code numbers for all the electronic security systems. ELLIE This is so...wonderful. NEIL hands her a garage door opener. NEIL I know it seems like overkill, but believe me, it's really easy to sneak into houses. CUT TO: 123. INTERIOR. BASEMENT. A FEW DAYS LATER. NEIL and ELLIE walk down the stairs, ELLIE in front, NEIL behind, with his hands covering her eyes. ELLIE So what's the big surprise? NEIL You'll see. Three more steps. At the bottom, NEIL faces ELLIE towards the empty cell and pulls his hands away. There is a sign over the cell, with the word HERS burned into the wood. Another sign, HIS, hangs over JAN's cell. There are newly built shelves against the other wall. NEIL The shelves are for all your trophy shoes. There's room for a hundred pairs. ELLIE That will take me years. NEIL There's more room when you need it. ELLIE I think I'm going to cry. JAN I think I'm going to puke. ELLIE Shut up, Jane. JAN You shut up. NEIL Both of you shut up. One of NEIL's eyes starts to twitch. ELLIE (to JAN) See what you did. NEIL She didn't do this. This tic is my father. Arguing. Yelling. Father. Tic. Scars. It's like I've got scars tattooed directly onto my brain. ELLIE A tic? Please. Go take some children's Tylenol. You want scars? My father? Raped me. My stepfather? Raped me. My mother? Raped me. NEIL I've got so many scars, I've hardly got any brain left. It's all just scars. ELLIE My daycare teacher when I was five? Raped me. NEIL My scars are my brain. ELLIE My psychiatrist? Raped me. A cop who pulled me over one time when I was sixteen? Raped me. 280 pounds of peace officer crawling up on top of me; 280 pounds of slobber and body odor lurching up and down on me on top of a police cruiser's hood. NEIL My scars have scars. ELLIE A Satanic cult I joined one time? They all raped me. NEIL My mother gave me enemas. JAN I have scars too, you know. NEIL Who asked you? ELLIE Be nice, Neil. Let her have her little scars. NEIL But she's...she's... JAN What? A woman? NEIL Yes. I mean no. I mean, she's a woman, yes, but... ELLIE But what? A woman can't have scars? NEIL She's meat. Meat doesn't scar. Meat gets cut. JAN Give me a knife and unlock this door and I'll give you more scars than you can handle. ELLIE American Psychogladiators. Cool. NEIL don't take her side. ELLIE I'm not taking sides. JAN She's staying out of it. Gimme a knife. Gimme a key. She stays out of it. ELLIE Totally on the sidelines. NEIL You're my girlfriend. JAN If you can't take a girl in a cage one-on-one, maybe you don't deserve a girlfriend. ELLIE Well? NEIL No. NEIL runs up the stairs. He stops. NEIL No. CUT TO: 124. INTERIOR. BEDROOM. SEVERAL DAYS LATER. NEIL and ELLIE are in bed watching TV. NEIL flips to AMERICAN PSYCHOS TONIGHT. ANNOUNCER Has the Stiletto Killer murdered again? We'll let you know right after the break. ELLIE Cool. Stop. NEIL Maybe we shouldn't kill anyone while we're seeing each other. ELLIE What? NEIL Maybe we could just try being normal for awhile. Stop complicating things with victims. ELLIE Oh, is my honeybunny feeling left out? NEIL No. ELLIE But They're just my stunbunnies, and You're my honeybunny. NEIL I know, but... ELLIE rolls on top of NEIL. She turns off the TV. ELLIE They get killer-kitty, but you get purry-kitty. ELLIE purrs. NEIL Well...OK...I guess. Go ahead and kill anyone you want. ELLIE lifts the covers and looks underneath. ELLIE So, where has Neilie-weelie hidden purry-kitty's catnip tonight? She dives under the covers. NEIL That's not it. That's not it. That's it. ELLIE Ooooh! There's so much catnip here, it'll take kitty just hours to play with it all. CUT TO: 125. EXTERIOR. CLUB M. LATER THAT NIGHT. ELLIE, dressed to kill, crosses the parking lot with LEWIS. ELLIE feeds LEWIS a drink which she has carried out of the club. CUT TO: 126. INTERIOR. NEIL's LIVING ROOM. SEVERAL DAYS LATER. ELLIE is lifting weights. NEIL is in his chair, watching TV. He comes across AMERICAN PSYCHOS TONIGHT. ELLIE looks up when the flipping stops. ELLIE What's wrong? ANNOUNCER Stiletto Killer kills again. Pictures right after the break. NEIL I haven't killed anyone in months. It's like someone stuck a v-chip inside my brain. ELLIE You're just tired. It happens to every killer. NEIL What if I never kill anyone else ever again? Have you ever heard of anyone like us who just stopped killing? What do I do if I just don't have it anymore? ELLIE What You're going to do is wake up one fine morning and say to yourself: Today I'm going to kill someone. And then you will. NEIL But what if I don't? ELLIE But you will. NEIL How would you know? You've never lost it before. He points at the TV. NEIL And I never got coverage like that. ELLIE Of course you did. Everybody was terrified of you. NEIL Was terrified. ELLIE They're only talking about me now because it's a slow news day. NEIL They're only talking about you because You're a woman. ELLIE Now wait just a second there, doodlebug. You can blame me if you think I'm not creative enough. You can blame me if you think I'm not careful enough. But don't even think about blaming me for being a woman, and sure as hell don't blame me because you've lost your killer instinct. NEIL If I weren't in love, maybe I'd still be acting like a predator. ELLIE And maybe if You'd get out of that chair and go kill someone, then maybe we'd both be a lot happier. You've got a perfectly good victim down in the basement. Instead of blaming me, why don't you go kill her? NEIL I don't feel like it. ELLIE (imitating NEIL) I don't feel like it. NEIL I don't. And maybe You'd understand if you stopped killing for awhile too. Be a little supportive. ELLIE My career didn't end when I met you, Neil. NEIL I don't kill anyone for a couple of months, and TV treats me like I never existed. It's always something new, something flashy, something creative. TV just doesn't appreciate a nuanced fetishistic murder anymore. ELLIE They're all against me. They're all against me. NEIL And they'd just bury Jane behind the weather forecast if I did kill her. ELLIE Jan. NEIL If I'm not going to be appreciated, then I just don't feel like it. ELLIE I think your problem's in the basement, not on TV, and not in your head. If You'd take a bullwhip to her and listen to screams instead of talk, then you wouldn't have any problems at all. NEIL I can kill her any time I want. I just don't want to right now. ELLIE Fine. NEIL Fine. CUT TO: 127. INTERIOR. BEDROOM. THAT EVENING. NEIL is sitting on his bed, flipping channels. ELLIE enters. ELLIE I've been thinking. NEIL keeps flipping channels. ELLIE I think we should kill a child. Two, three years old, while it's still an it. No male, no female. You and me. Us. Together. It's new. It's flashy. It's creative. NEIL turns off the TV. NEIL I love you, purry-kitty. They kiss. They both suddenly wince in pain. They both have trickles of blood running from their mouths. ELLIE You bit me. NEIL You bit me. ELLIE So, is my Neilie-weelie feeling like a big, strong predator again? They kiss. NEIL Ow. ELLIE Ouch. NEIL Ow. CUT TO: 128. INTERIOR. ELLIE's JAGUAR. THE NEXT DAY. ELLIE and NEIL are parked across the street from a playground filled with children. ELLIE is watching the kids. NEIL is watching a bus stop on the other side of the street. A young woman, DOMINIQUE, is sitting at the bus stop. ELLIE What do you think about the puny one in the overalls? It looks androgynous. Looks like a screamer, too. You like screamers. NEIL Uh-huh. ELLIE I say we follow it home. Get the mother out of the way... NEIL Uh-huh. ELLIE ...but we don't want to kill the mother. We want to jerk her around afterwards. We... NEIL Uh-huh. ELLIE ...are you listening to me, Neil? NEIL Uh...sure, mother. I mean, the mother. ELLIE looks where NEIL was looking. ELLIE Were you watching that girl? NEIL No, I... ELLIE I thought we were here to find a kid, Neil. A kid for us. NEIL I wasn't doing anything. I...I just... wanted to cut her open. ELLIE You weren't looking at her with killer-kitty eyes. You want her to play with your catnip, don't you? NEIL No. I was dissecting her with my eyes. ELLIE Liar! NEIL I want to rape her. I want to kill her. I want to pull out her intestines. Really. Honest. ELLIE Liar! NEIL I... ELLIE If you want to kill someone so bad, then why don't you kill that little bitch in the basement? NEIL I... ELLIE She's been there so long, I feel like killing her myself. NEIL I...I was going to kill her tonight. ELLIE Get out. NEIL What? ELLIE Get out of my car. Now. NEIL But... ELLIE It's over, Neil. Us. You and me. Together. It's over. You can kill people, or don't kill people, whatever you like, but You're doing it without me. Get out. NEIL But... ELLIE menaces NEIL with her stungun. He flails backwards, out of the car. ELLIE shuts the door and drives away. NEIL But... CUT TO: 129. EXTERIOR. SIDEWALK. MINUTES LATER. NEIL is walking home. He passes a dirty bookstore. A sign in the window says: ALL S&M MAGAZINES HALF PRICE!!! NEIL doesn't look up. CUT TO: 130. INTERIOR. ELLIE's JAGUAR. ELLIE is at a stoplight, in the left-hand turn lane. The light changes. She hesitates, then makes a right-hand turn, cutting off a car, which gives her the horn. She smiles and waves at the driver. CUT TO: 131. EXTERIOR. SIDEWALK. NEIL is walking faster. He passes a gunshop with a sign in the window, which says: HUNTING KNIFE SALE--TODAY ONLY! CUT TO: 132. INTERIOR. ELLIE's JAGUAR. ELLIE makes a right turn at another corner. CUT TO: 133. EXTERIOR. SIDEWALK. NEIL is walking faster. He passes a butcher-shop with a sign in the window, which says: HELP WANTED: EXPERIENCED BUTCHER. CUT TO: 134. INTERIOR. ELLIE's JAGUAR. ELLIE pulls up behind a bus. DOMINIQUE picks up her backpack from the bench and boards the bus. CUT TO: 135. EXTERIOR. SIDEWALK. NEIL is stopped at an intersection, bouncing from foot to foot. He is standing in front of a post office. Several police cars are outside, lights revolving. Paramedics are wheeling gurneys with wounded people out of the building. The light changes, and NEIL sprints across the intersection. CUT TO: 136. INTERIOR. ELLIE's JAGUAR. The bus stops at another bus stop. DOMINIQUE gets off. ELLIE puts her stungun in her lap. CUT TO: 137. EXTERIOR. NEIL's HOUSE. NEIL enters his garage. CUT TO: 138. INTERIOR. NEIL's BEDROOM. NEIL takes JACKIE out of a drawer. MOTHER (voice-over) I told you that you weren't man enough for her, Neil. NEIL Shut up, Mother. MOTHER (voice-over) But did you listen to me? No. What do I know? I'm only your mother. NEIL takes his security guard's badge out of a drawer. MOTHER (voice-over) I tried to teach you how to please a woman. 'don't stop tonguing my nipples, and for Heaven's sake be careful of that; that's my clitoris, not a pop-top.' How many times did I have to tell you that before you finally got it right? Not that you were ever really very good at it. NEIL Shut up, Mother. MOTHER (voice-over) And no, I will not unlock your cock- ring and leash until you get everything just right. CUT TO: 139. INTERIOR. ATTIC. NEIL is kneeling next to his mother's corpse, winding strip after strip of duct tape around her mouth. CUT TO: 140. INTERIOR. ATTIC STAIRWAY. NEIL rushes down the stairs, leaving the attic door open. CUT TO: 141. EXTERIOR. NEIL's HOUSE. The garage door opens and NEIL's Taurus pulls out. CUT TO: 142. EXTERIOR. ALLEY BEHIND SERENGETI's. NEIL is sitting in his car. SASHA walks down the alley towards the employee's entrance. NEIL intercepts him and flashes his badge. NEIL Police. I've got some questions for you. SASHA But they told me a black lambskin, full-body mummification-sheath complete with prong gag, suspension straps and a set of detachable buttplugs was totally legal. Totally. NEIL What? Just get over there. By the car. Now. SASHA moves towards the car. NEIL follows, drawing JACKIE. SASHA Hey, this isn't a cop car. Who the hell are you? NEIL Do you think I'm creative? SASHA Huh? SASHA notices JACKIE just before NEIL punches him in the face with JACKIE's handle. SASHA falls. NEIL opens his trunk. CUT TO: 143. EXTERIOR. BEHIND AN APARTMENT BUILDING. ELLIE is standing at the open trunk of her Jaguar. DOMINIQUE, unconscious, is inside the trunk. ELLIE slams the lid closed. CUT TO: 144. INTERIOR. NEIL's BASEMENT. NEIL drags SASHA, still unconscious, down the stairs and dumps him in the empty cell. JAN Who's he? NEIL New business. But first, old business. NEIL sets up his tape recorder between the cells and turns it on. NEIL I'm going to kill you today. JAN sits on the bed. NEIL pushes the fake cast through the bars, holding it for JAN to take. NEIL Sign this. JAN No. NEIL People like me. I have friends. Sign. JAN Fuck off. He pulls the cast back. NEIL You can scream if you want. I like screaming. Just remember: Scream into the microphone. CUT TO: 145. INTERIOR. NEIL's GARAGE. The garage door opens and ELLIE's Jaguar backs in. CUT TO: 146. INTERIOR. BASEMENT. NEIL draws JACKIE. NEIL moves JACKIE around as if JACKIE is excited. JACKIE Rellik! Rellik! JAN Relic? JACKIE 'Killer' spelled backwards. Try and keep up with me here, you dizzy broad. JAN (to NEIL) You do realize that that voice is coming out of your mouth, don't you? JACKIE She thinks she's one smart cookie, don't she? All the answers, just like every dame. JAN (between NEIL and JACKIE) You do realize that at least one of you is nuts, right? JACKIE But they all scream the same when the time comes for The Jackie Sexknife Show. CUT TO: 147. INTERIOR. GARAGE. ELLIE manhandles the unconscious DOMINIQUE out of the trunk and lets her thump on the floor. DOMINIQUE groans. ELLIE OOPS. CUT TO: 148. INTERIOR. BASEMENT. JAN So what am I supposed to be now? A trophy victim? So everybody will still think You're a big manly rapist? NEIL What? JACKIE don't listen to her, buddy. Dames is treacherous. She's nothing but meat. Meat, I tellya. JAN points at SASHA. JAN I can see I'm not your first choice in sex anymore. So what happened? You kidnapped me because Chippendale's wasn't in town that night? Or was I supposed to be your beard all along? NEIL No, no. It's not like that. He... JAN I know what he is. You couldn't come out of the closet before you kidnapped me? NEIL I didn't come out of the closet. I... JAN Oh, so You're OK with being a rapist and a murderer, but You're ashamed of being gay? NEIL No. I mean...no...I'm not gay. JAN indicates SASHA. JAN Then who's your boyfriend? NEIL He's not my boyfriend. I'm just being creative. JAN Is that what They're calling it these days? CUT TO: 149. INTERIOR. GARAGE. ELLIE takes out her clump of color-coded keys to open the door into the kitchen. CUT TO: 150. INTERIOR. BASEMENT. NEIL unlocks JAN's cell door. JACKIE don't let 'em push you around, buddy. JAN Saw your lips move. The door between the garage and the kitchen opens upstairs. NEIL glances up. JAN is off her bed in an instant, stake in hand. She stabs. NEIL ducks. NEIL is wounded and retreats, slashing with JACKIE as he goes. JAN keeps charging. NEIL runs up the stairs, with JAN following, screaming. CUT TO: 151. INTERIOR. KITCHEN. The door into the basement is open. ELLIE dumps DOMINIQUE in front of the open door. NEIL and JAN come bounding up the stairs, pushing past ELLIE and DOMINIQUE. JAN is trying to stab NEIL in the eye; NEIL is trying to slit JAN's throat. NEIL Quit it. You're meat. Knife cuts meat. They notice ELLIE and DOMINIQUE. They freeze. ELLIE What's going on? NEIL Nothing. NEIL indicates DOMINIQUE. NEIL Who's that? ELLIE Nobody. NEIL I thought you didn't want to see me anymore. JAN Big surprise. NEIL Shut up. Meat shuts up. ELLIE You told me I could use the basement whenever I wanted. NEIL Not now. ELLIE You mean you lied to me? JAN Get in line. NEIL No, I... ELLIE I can't believe you lied to me. JAN Excuse me, but we're kind of in the middle of something. ELLIE don't mind me. I'm not even supposed to be here apparently, so I'm just going to slip off to the basement with nobody. NEIL But...she's a woman. You don't kill women. I kill women. JAN So you say. ELLIE I'll kill anyone I want to kill. JAN Yeah. You don't own her. NEIL But...you can't take her to the basement. ELLIE reaches out with her foot and shoves DOMINIQUE down the stairs. ELLIE OOPS. NEIL You can't. You just can't. ELLIE Why? You got another woman down there? JAN The girlfriend is always the last to know. JAN makes a limp-wristed stabbing motion with her stake. JAN Turns out we're more of a spare sex than a fair sex, honey, at least as far as psychopriss is concerned. ELLIE You're gay? NEIL No. JAN He talks to his knife, too. And the knife talks back. JACKIE Yeah, I talk. Why shouldn't I talk? ELLIE I can't believe you lied to me about being gay. JAN He's ashamed. JACKIE (to JAN) I got lots to say, baby. Come on and let me whisper in your ear. ELLIE Being gay is one thing. You can't help that, but a talking knife? That's what you should really be ashamed of. NEIL I'm not ashamed. ELLIE If You're not ashamed, then why didn't you tell me You're gay? NEIL I'm not gay. ELLIE I bet you lied about everything. JACKIE A dame complaining about lying. It ain't natural. ELLIE Quit talking like that! NEIL But... JAN Flowers won't get you out of this one. NEIL But... JAN Even when you catch them red-handed, they just keep on lying. ELLIE You're probably not even really the Cassette Rapist. NEIL Of course I am. JAN I've been here for months. He's never even tried to rape me. ELLIE (to JAN) Hell, I'd have done you myself by now if it weren't for... ELLIE indicates NEIL. JAN (to NEIL) See? ELLIE (to NEIL) She's completely rape-worthy. NEIL I'm not gay. I'm not. ELLIE Then do her now. Right now. NEIL I'm trying! JAN Maybe I should bend over and whistle showtunes. NEIL I...I... JACKIE I...I... ELLIE You're not a rapist. You're nothing but a limp, copycat bundle of vegetarian psychoses. You're a tantrum with a big knife. The terrible two's with a confused sex drive. Your first kill was probably a misunderstanding. You're a serial accident, a mass mistake. You should be called the OOPS Killer. You... NEIL slashes at ELLIE with JACKIE, cutting her across her collarbone. CUT TO: 152. INTERIOR. LIVING ROOM. ELLIE flies into the living room as if she's been thrown. NEIL lurches in after her, with JAN on his back. NEIL throws JAN off, then ELLIE hurls a dumbbell into NEIL's groin. The three fall into a heap of knives, fists and teeth. CUT TO: 153. INTERIOR. BASEMENT. DOMINIQUE and SASHA begin to stir. Sounds of fighting above. CUT TO: 154. INTERIOR. UPSTAIRS HALLWAY. ELLIE rushes down the hall and turns into the bedroom. NEIL follows more slowly, holding his side where the dumbbell struck. CUT TO: 155. INTERIOR. BEDROOM. ELLIE jumps across the bed, reaches underneath her side, and comes out with her icepick. CUT TO: 156. INTERIOR. UPSTAIRS HALLWAY. NEIL lopes down the hall and turns into the bedroom, and then almost immediately backpedals out the door with the icepick in his leg. CUT TO: 157. INTERIOR. LIVING ROOM. JAN picks herself up and follows upstairs. CUT TO: 158. INTERIOR. UPSTAIRS HALLWAY. ELLIE sprints out of the bedroom and heads for the attic stairs. NEIL No! don't go up there. ELLIE stops at the bottom of the stairs. She puts one foot on the bottom step. ELLIE OOPS. NEIL No, don't. ELLIE takes two more steps. ELLIE OOPS. OOPS. ELLIE turns and runs up the stairs. NEIL throws JACKIE, hitting ELLIE in the back. ELLIE falls and crawls into the attic on hands and knees. JACKIE Help me, buddy. Help me. NEIL stands and starts hobbling after ELLIE, pulling the icepick out of his leg. JAN catches him, jumps on his back again, and they stab each other. ELLIE (offscreen) Dammit! Dammit! Dammit! I knew you lived with your mother! CUT TO: 159. INTERIOR. BASEMENT. DOMINIQUE gets to her hands and knees. She sees SASHA and the dungeon. CUT TO: 160. INTERIOR. UPSTAIRS HALLWAY. NEIL throws JAN off again and runs into the attic, JAN's stake stuck through his hand. JAN follows, the icepick in her leg. CUT TO: 161. INTERIOR. BASEMENT. DOMINIQUE tries to rouse SASHA. CUT TO: 162. INTERIOR. UPSTAIRS HALLWAY. NEIL backpedals out of the attic. JAN and ELLIE are using MOTHER's corpse as a battering ram to push him down the stairs. They all sprawl into the hallway. CUT TO: 163. INTERIOR. BASEMENT. DOMINIQUE hooks a finger through the ring in SASHA's dog collar and shakes him. DOMINIQUE Wake up right now or I'll leave you here. CUT TO: 164. INTERIOR. LIVING ROOM. NEIL staggers down the stairs into the living room, JAN once again on his back. The icepick is again stuck in NEIL. JACKIE is stuck in JAN. NEIL throws JAN off again, and then he starts back up the stairs. NEIL I'm going to kill you so dead, purry-kitty. JACKIE don't leave me, buddy. NEIL turns his head to look at JACKIE. MOTHER's decapitated, duct-tape-wrapped head flies down the stairs and hits NEIL on the back of his head. ELLIE comes screaming down the stairs after the head, the stake stuck into her, swinging one of MOTHER's arms like a club. CUT TO: 165. INTERIOR. BASEMENT. DOMINIQUE gets SASHA to his feet. SASHA What... The sounds of fighting upstairs diminish and stop. DOMINIQUE Shut up and do what I tell you. They tiptoe up the stairs, DOMINIQUE in the lead. CUT TO: 166. INTERIOR. KITCHEN. DOMINIQUE and SASHA enter the kitchen. The room is empty. The house is quiet. They go to the living room. CUT TO: 167. INTERIOR. LIVING ROOM. DOMINIQUE and SASHA stand in the doorway. NEIL, ELLIE and JAN are all lying on the floor. Blood is everywhere. JAN is dead, her own stake in her forehead. ELLIE and NEIL are lying just out of each other's reach. ELLIE has the icepick in her stomach. NEIL has JACKIE in his chest. NEIL and ELLIE look at each other. NEIL Was it good for you too? ELLIE Best ever. Wanna go again, honey... ELLIE dies. MOTHER (voice-over) You finally brought home a nice girl, Neil. She reminds me of me. And what do you do? You kill her. NEIL Shut up, Mother. JACKIE Mmmmmm. Mmmmmph. MOTHER (voice-over) I never told you this, Neil, but you were a mistake. Your father's condom slipped off. And another thing... NEIL pulls JACKIE out of his chest. JACKIE They got me, pal. I think I'm a goner. Everything's going black. JACKIE slips out of NEIL's grasp. NEIL Jackie. JACKIE Buddy. NEIL dies. Everything is quiet for a moment. DOMINIQUE Are you as turned on as I am? SASHA I think I saw a whip downstairs. DOMINIQUE unslings her backpack. DOMINIQUE I have my own. She unzips the pack and pulls out a whip. SASHA In that case, do you mind if I whip mine out too? Another zipper unzips. A whip cracks. SASHA screams in ecstasy. CUT TO: 168. INTERIOR. BASEMENT. DOMINIQUE hits the STOP button on the tape recorder. She hits REWIND. She hits RECORD. She uncoils her whip. She swings. SASHA screams. She whips again. SASHA screams again. -FADE TO BLACK-
Back to Martystories.